Tonight i sought the shores of avalon on my own for the first time in a long time. Ive been working on personal wounds a great deal as of late…and felt it was time to seek the blessings of the Nine Maidens of avalon.This was a meditation i constructed during reading Healing the Wounded King.
I began my journey by following the full moon ritual structure of my hearth Daughters of The Grail and at the point when an Immrama is to take place i began mine. From here i will document what transpired on the otherside:
I stood upon the shores of the lake, mist was all around me and i wore a long heavy, very wet, robe. It trailed behind me several feet and almost seemed to grab onto the ground as i passed back and forth. I walked considering why i was here. What was it i really was seeking. I felt my emotions rolling in side me like the waves of the ocean. After several moments of self doubt i turned to the shore and threw up my arms. As i did so i shouted;
Barinthus! I seek healing!
Not long after that the Mists parted and i saw the Barge coming through. I saw the Horned Boatman standing upon it, silhouetted by the Large Full Moon behind him. As the barge scrapped to a stop on the shores i stepped forward to it, as i did the outer most layer of my robe, the longest and heaviest, fell from my shoulders and hit the ground is a sort of “slop” sound.
Barinthus help out his hand to me, his face was painted in many blue swirling colors and a reddish brown beard covered most of his jaw line. Upon his head were deer antlers, i wasnt able to see if they grew there or if they were held on by some thing. I stepped onto the barge and took my place at the front of the ship. I now stood in a smaller, but still heavy outer robe and below it a slight and airy white robe. We made our way across the lake, the ride was totally silent save for my breathing.
Landing upon the shores i stepped off and was greeted by a much younger than normal version of my Guide. She appeared in her early teens if that and she smiled ear too ear and grabbed my hand. We took off running at break neck speeds, or rather she did. For some reason i dug my heals in and didnt want to run. I kep repeating that she was going to fast, slow down, why are we running!? by she just giggled and kept pulling. Her smile was warm, almost literally like the sun.
Finally we reached the orchard and she seemed to give up or i did one or the other, because i lost my grip on her hand and she kept running. I stopped and gaped after her, i had no idea where i was or how to find the Nine Sisters…i had expected her to guide me…thats what guides do right!? So i found my tree and slumped too the ground her Her base. I sat there scared,lonely and unsure of what to do next…
It seemed like forever passed as i sat there feeling sorry for my self and thinking my self an idiot for letting go of her hand when i looked up to my self and thought,
Well if all else failes…go moonwise
so i got up and went around the Mound in a moonwise direction. It felt like it didnt take long yet it must have…when finally i came to the Red Spring…save for..now there was a sort of large stone platform next too it with a huge boiling cauldron on it…and nine women standing around it… Three in white were dipping into the red spring and pouring water into the cauldron, three in red where tending and stiring the cauldron and nine in black were dipping water out of the cauldron and pouring it on the ground.
I knew i had found them. The Nine Sister of Avalon stood before me…and i was just a bit nervous(ok a lot nervous) what the hell had i come here for? i didnt specifically know why i just knew i needed healing… shortly the lady in red at the center, stiring the large cauldron looked me square in the eyes. As she spoke, all nine women spoke with her.
What do you seek?
i sort of stuttered our
I seek to be whole!
holy hell! where did that come from….what…yeah thats true that is why i came here. suddenly it was like i had always known that but just didnt think of it that way… the Nine women said;
How will you be whole?
like im supposta know that!? right? thaats why i came here i need them to tell me what to do….right? But like a fountain bubbling forth i sputter out:
wait…what? ok….and again i think to my self…well duh. but again i am left to ask my self…compassion for whom? my assumption currently is self and the world.
the nine say to me:
Then come forth and be ye healed.
I feel my self becoming lighter as my robes fall too my feet my whole body is so light i drift from the ground. I see the center most Mother dip a large chalice into the cauldron and as she lifts it up i drift forward almost nose too nose with her and sip from the cup. Its like an adrenalin shot almost. I feel the liquid tingle all over my body as i swallow it. It invigorates my whole being.
The Nine speak again a farewell i hear it only a little through the buzzing in my ears as i drift further away back into my body.